Let's see.

I went in for that interview today thinking I would be a fail and it would be a huge waste of time. I took the assessments and I scored 88% on the call center stimulation and the message retaining sections, and for the typing test, I scored 100% accuracy with 63 words per minute. Thought it was going to be somewhere around the area of 35, so that surprised me. I hit it off extremely well with my interviewer and I got the job as a temp. I start on the 29th and I want to be excited, but given the sudden turn of events in my life, I'm not.

My family is falling apart.

My mother has been hiding money and my father found out about it. Rather than fight it out for a few days, they're actually divorcing this time. On top if it, my father is most likely terminally ill, so to cry out for attention, the fucking bitch walked out of the house bending over and bemoaning about how she's "sick".

We're losing the house in August, in all likelihood, my father lost his job because his boss is pissed about the doctor's notice saying he ought to be out of work for a week, my brother is saying that he just doesn't care anymore and is leaving anyways, and here I am, all alone, about to smoke a bowl because I'm depressed and don't want to deal with shit.

Greg showed me The Wall on Sunday and I absolutely hated it except for the Trial scene at the end. I was going to dedicate a post to it, but I don't have the heart for it right now. If someone wants to comment and talk about it, I'll do that, but basically, this is why I hated it. I agree that it's creative as hell and artistic and brilliant, but I did NOT like it.

• The lead character is a whiny little bitch who cries about every single misfortune that's ever befallen him. Whaah, daddy died. Whaah, I have an Oedipal complex because my mother neglected me. Whaah my girlfriend cheated on me. Whaah, I was artistically suppressed in school. Whaaah.
  
• I did not, did NOT appreciate the fucking misogyny in that film. Dude, so your girlfriend's a whore, that doesn't mean that all of them are. Should have paid attention to her and maybe she wouldn't have cheated on you.
  
• I had no idea what was going on for 75% of it, and if that makes me an idiot, so what.
  

I discussed it with Tino briefly today and he told me that my interpretation was way, way off, but was too tired to talk about it with me. If I'm wrong, go ahead and tell me, but like that's the impression I got from it. -.-


I don't know what to say anymore.

EDIT--

One more bit about the wall, Kaila.

*during the Trial scene*
Greg: That's kind of a scary picture...
Me: Yeah....
*few minutes*
Me: Actually...
Greg: 0.o?
Me: It looks like the shit zhalin used to draw 0.o

I had a very nice evening.

Greg and I hung out at Tino's for a bit. We watched a movie called Thirteen. It was pretty fucked up. The camera angles bothered me at first, but the tumbling and the use of light and colour grew on me eventually, especially in the drunk/drugged up scenes. You don't notice that the latter half of the film is in icy colours until the very last scene, where it changes back to warmer tones. I liked that. I liked the movie. It was very decent.

Um, we watched an episode of In Treatment together, which I enjoyed somewhat, and spent a couple hours rotting in front of Family Guy. I straightened his hair, he straightened mine, we ate cookies and I drank diet coke. Lots of cuddling and gayness. <3

I finally just lost my temper with Becky. I mean, I am trying to do what Greg and Tony want me to do, to let the past go and go on with my life (he apologized, by the way, in an EXTREMELY adult fashion of which I was impressed and very grateful. I don't dislike him anymore, I actually think he's a decent person.), but god DAMN it does that whore piss me off. I can't stand people who fake personality. I can't stand people who try to buy friends. And most of all, I fucking HATE girls who, after a breakup, whore themselves around the crew until one of the single boys makes the unfortunate decision of attachment. She needs so desperately to be in a relationship that she'll take ANYONE and say "I love you" within three days.

Dumb. Bitch.

And then she's pretending to be all cutesy on Facebook. "Oh me? I HIDE from cameras! Little old innocent me! Tee hee!" -.- Bull. Shit. So I called her out on her flagrant act and told her to stop pretending to be modest when she obviously isn't. I kind of regret that now, but only because I don't want it to turn into a huge drama fest.

But damn it, I can dislike whoever the fuck I want.

I'm going to read more It and go to sleep now. Goodnight.

So last night was Tino's party, which was a lot of fun aside from the fact that this kid showed up who Greg didn't like. He used to make fun of him in middle school or something, I don't know. Kid was flirting with me hardcore and Greg was getting pissed, but considering that every five seconds I was babbling about how much I love my boyfriend, it really didn't matter.

Everyone leaves eventually, so Greg decides he wants to chill at Ryan's for a bit. Okay, that's cool. Tino's exhausted so he decides to stay home. No big deal, right?

Nope.

We get to Ryan's and Blair's brother is there. He seems chill. The boys play a couple games of beer pong while I sit and reel. They have a good couple of rounds. Greg owned the first two games before he was against Blair's brother, and then HE owned.

I'm halfheartedly participating in Kings with a can of Miller High Life, when Blair's brother brings up what happened with Blair into conversation. No big deal. Him and Greg are actually having a totally civilized conversation about it all. Blair's brother just wants to know what happened, like OUR side of the story, so Greg's telling him.

Once again, allow me to emphasize that it's a completely, completely civilized conversation. No insults, no pettiness, nothing.

And that's when Ryan flips out and punches Blair's brother. After that, he throws Greg to the ground and starts fucking choking him. Legit. With murder in his eyes.

Before that point, I was pleasantly reeling. Not drunk, just still a little high from Tino's. My high was instantly blown. I vaulted off the couch. I don't know how long it took, but me and Blair's brother eventually managed to physically pull Ryan off of Greg, and that's when Greg and I fucking booked it out of there. He tore ass through Stoughton until we hit a stop light, and then we just held each other and cried.

Naturally, his ego is bruised, despite the fact that I'm proud of him for leaving when we did. However, he is now gathering his friends to go beat Ryan's ass, which is totally pointless in my opinion and I don't know what to do or say.

Fuck my life.

I'm dying.

After waiting for about an hour and a half for Mike in the SHITTY part of Brockton in order to help him move, Greg and I decided to leave. He wasn't showing up, we'd been waiting for an extremely long time in a SKETCHY ass area, so we said fuck it, let's go. (funny note. We were chatting amicably, and I was reading Apt Pupil, and suddenly he goes "Honey, don't look..." so I look up to see this little black boy in secondhand clothes taking a leak RIGHT IN FRONT OF US, like not even against the apartment, he just unzipped his fly and let it rain all over the driveway. I laughed so hard and had to cover my face with my book.) We stop at DQ to get ice creams, then head on back to his house. I read my book, he watches television, and I feel a little swoopy to my stomach. Silly me attributes this to the ice cream, and I decide to focus on Greg's toothache instead, playing nurse with Orajel and instructing him not to SWALLOW the stuff.

Time passes, we act the old couple until about ten when he takes me home. We kiss goodnight, everything's cool, and then I realize that I have to use the bathroom.

No problem.

NOT.

Second I sit on the toilet, I'm subjected to horrendous, lower abdominal pain, and for the next twenty minutes I suffer from bouts of painful diarrhea. When I finally think it's over and am able to stand, I head downstairs, only to be overcome with the urge once more.

Cool.

So once that passes, I stand up, only to feel profoundly ill to my stomach once again. I then proceed to vomit quite unceremoniously into the sink. Stuff splatters in my hair. Cool.

All done now, right? Right? Excellent!

Wrong. Way wrong.

I vomit two more times, all the while shouting at my mother that yes, I'm fine, clean up, and finally feel a little better. I grab a bottle of water to try and make myself feel better, take like two sips and whoop, up it comes, haven't legitimately puked up water since my night at the E.R in Baltimore.

Yay.

I hope to god I don't have swine flu.

Joy of joys.

Crew drama is giving me a headache. Boy dumps girl, girl whores herself throughout crew, girl finally manages to attach herself to a single guy in the crew, girl's ex boyfriend gets jealous even though he HAD the opportunity to have her back, ex boyfriend tries going after girl's new boyfriend's ex girlfriend whom he's still hung up over---yeah me and greg are done with this shit.

Feel slightly better now, can at least keep water down. So tired though.

Don't really want to talk about the Facebook drama (and there's lots, at the moment, dear God.)

So here's a meme from QQ

If you happen to be working on some creative writing project, fanfiction or NaNoWriMo or what have you, post exactly one sentence from each of your current work(s) in progress in your journal. It should probably be your favourite or most intriguing sentence so far, but what you choose is entirely your discretion. Mention the title (and genre) if you like, but don't mention anything else -- this is merely to whet the general appetite for your forthcoming work(s).

Title: Invitation
Genre: Horror

The pale woman's progress as she entered the restaurant was languid and full of purpose. She prowled Amy thought, transfixed. She prowled like an animal. A goose inexplicably walked over her grave at the thought.

Lara was bustling behind the counter, not really busy, just looking it. She poured coffee with trembling hands, and her doe's eyes bugged to nearly comical proportions as the pale woman took a seat before her, steepling her long, thin fingers on the bar. She smiled, and it was not a nice smile, it was a smile that made Amy uncomfortable, even from her distance. Still, she watched.

"Hi, there," Lara said brightly, but the cheerfulness in her tone didn't quite match her eyes. Amy saw that very clearly.

"Good morning," said the pale woman, still smiling that awful, humorless smile. Her voice was like oil, dark and liquid at the same time.

"How about some coffee?" Lara chirped, already turning around to fetch it, regardless of the strange customer's preference. She was scared, Amy realized, almost immediately. It wasn't just herself feeling...feeling...

Well, funny.

"I think not," said the pale woman. "I think I'll just...sit. The sign on the door reads that breakfast cannot be ordered past eleven o'clock. Ten minutes from now, I see."

"Yup," said Lara. "I'm all done. Going home soon!"

The pale woman laughed, and it was a dry, hollow sound, one without a bit of mirth in it.

"I wish," she said, and Amy felt really funny, felt sick and disoriented, the same way she felt when she saw the black swans that morning.

"I wish I had a home."

***

I'm not there yet. That's not the actual snippet. The only bit of that transaction that I have planned is the pale woman saying "I wish I had a home", as it's imperative to the plot. Which I don't want to reveal just yet. Yeah. But after that is when I mold Lara into my own Lisa Garland, haw haw haw.

My dad said the computer was broken. Um, no it wasn't, the battery was dead. *sigh* wow.

You know, I want very, very badly to audition for Little Women next week. Being involved with something theatrical again would be good for me right now.

However, according to Facebook, Olya may be auditioning as well. I don't have any problems with her anymore, we've resolved the confrontation that we got into over the summer. However, it irritates me that she was sniffing around my boyfriend and then, when I confronted her about it, said that she wasn't "interested" in guys in relationships, and tried to make me feel overly jealous by suggesting I "trust" him a bit more.

Any man is going to be tempted by a high-school aged, pretty blonde girl, for one.

Two, she knew what she was doing, by telling Tony that she "liked" Greg, when Tony had been trying to find him a new girlfriend. That whole incident in the summer, you know...with my supposedly being fat. (Yeah, okay, I'm totally obese, it's why I was accepted into like four fetish modelling sites *rolls eyes* Not JUST suicide girls.) It's common knowledge that Tony wants me out of Greg's life.

So basically, I don't appreciate some little jailbait girl trying to sabotage what I have with my boyfriend. Sorry. Just don't. I mean, I have a lot of respect for her. She's obviously a very intelligent, well-grounded young lady who has a lot going for her in life. However, I do not, do NOT like the situation she was involved in, with Tony's attempts at matchmaking. I won't ever know how much she knew about that, but I don't like it, not one bit.

In essence, if I see her at the audition, worse, if she becomes part of the production (I think I'm well enough in sas26 and __simplywicked's clique to fairly assume that I'll be SOME part of the production :P) I'm probably going to have a mental breakdown. I mean, I wouldn't do anything to harm her of course, it would just be emotionally draining.

I'm a drama queen, by the way. Think it has to do with my being a Saggitarius who was born on the first of the month.

Well I made rent money in the 12 some odd (? I don't even know anymore) hours that I worked tonight, however, WORST NIGHT EVER.

Just...just...fail. Don't even want to elaborate. WORST FUCKING NIGHT EVER. Excuse me while I, oh, I don't know, hang myself by my thumbs or splice myself open...something of the like. I hate drama. Hate it hate it fucking hate it. If people don't get THEIR way fucking immediately they go crying to higher corporate powers and expect you not to retaliate offensively...DON'T GIVE ME ATTITUDE if you want me to do something for you. And don't fucking THREATEN me with "protocol" if you don't expect me to throw it back in your face, hypocrite. Wow. -_-;

So at one in the morning last night, I get a text from my mother telling me that she's throwing me out of the house, for neglecting to call her the night before when I stayed at Greg's. My phone died, mind, and I had no idea what the fuck her number was.

So I call her after I got that text, we fight, and my father is tired and just wants the psycho bitch to shut the fuck up, so he tells me not to come home. She PRETENDED TO BE MY FATHER and texted me saying that "u treat ur mother like shit u need 2 get ur shit together well get restrain order if u dont leave 2nite"

.....

Mind you, the cunt also tried to file a missing person's report on me, barely five hours before this.

So after the WORST night of my life (staying over boyfriend's best friend's house because I had nowhere to go, boyfriend's best friend telling me to cheat on Greg with him, me getting creeped out and not sleeping, really starting to think that I have no guy friends because it seems like they all want to get in my pants in situations like these) I come home to get my shit and she's crying. I get the "I LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH we didn't really WANT you to go, we JUST WANT you to FOLLOW THE RULES" speech, hem, BULL. SHIT.)

I just ignored her, and went to go look at the apartment I've been trying to get into for the past week or so. I met the landlord, signed the lease, worked out an agreement with him regarding paying the security deposit in incriments, bam, Ashe has her own place, finally, and is moving in on Wednesday. It's not glamourous by any stretch of the imagination, no kitchen or bathroom, but it'll definitely suffice. It's not TINY, like I have my own closet and there are HUGE windows so the room is really nicely lit. I'm wicked excited to move in. My landlord is really flexible with money...my friend from work who was kind enough to tell me about the opening was explaining to me about how she showed up WITH HER BAGS and he let her move in that night. So I'm good, I just really need to concentrate on packing and stuff for the next few days.

Greg promised me a nice day for just the two of us tomorrow, so I'm very excited about that. I expect next week will be very stressful for me, so if I turn into a dragon lady, I apologize in advance.

Cigarette. Now.

( What Deb just told me. )

I love this girl.

Seriously.

Love.

I can't even begin to express how better that made me feel.

The other girl isn't a total cunt, too, she just apologized and totally reassured me that nothing has/will happen(ed) between her and Greg. Which also makes me feel better.

He was drunk and running his mouth, that's it, he doesn't even remember anything he said.

Woooow, drama.

My butt and thighs hurt from running, seriously jogged across town. But I *am* losing weight, definitely. My stomach isn't pudgy, it's getting firm, and I don't have love handles anymore. My torso is actually very hourglass-looking...at least getting there.

Thank God my parents heard us arguing last night, my dad left me cigarettes. Haha...

btw, got into suicide girls

Don't know if I'm gonna send the actual photoshoot in yet though. heh.

I don't even want to get into the dramatics of last night.

My eyes are completely bloodshot from crying for three hours straight and I STILL have a motherfucker of a headache.

My parents can go to hell. Thank Eru I have adult friends with cars and who actually care about my psychotics...

Excuse me while I fall asleep in the shower.

I just want Greg...

Meh.

So I went into Cumby's last night to retrieve my last-ever check. Steve didn't know how to cash them in the store, so he called my old boss.

Boss: I want to talk to Ashley.
Steve: *hands the phone to me*
Me: Yeah?
Boss: *starts rambling and accusing me of stealing, asks where the key I lost is*
Me: *very calmly* Look, I'm sorry, I don't know why you're flipping out on me, but I lost the key. I don't know where it is, I don't know what to tell you.
Boss: And you come in here looking for check. This is business! I need key!
Me: So you're DENYING ME MY CHECK?!
Boss: *starts rambling in badly accented English*
Steve: *sees we're arguing and takes the phone, puts it on speaker* Yeah...uh...Alex...Ashley's gone. She left. But for future reference, how do I cash a check?
Alex: Good. She's a bitch. *goes on to explain how to go about cashing a check*

I was so heated.

How dare he go and call me a bitch when he's the one who made this difficult?! I fucking offered to stay for my last week, and he didn't want me to. I could very well go to human resources with all the shit he pulls, like not paying Steve for the hours he worked and completely ignoring company protocol and keeping extra money in the register. But I don't want the trouble, even IF the sonofabitch dared to call me a bitch.

Gah.

I chilled with Steve for a couple hours and that was cool, though. We talked about random, pointless shit haha. It was cool.

And now I call Diamond.. @_@

So last night, I learned the valuable life’s lesson of how drinking does not make your problems go away.

As you all know, my mother left us, and there has been bad drama with her going on. I came home last night to grab my brandy and change into cooler clothes, and she was there, with my aunt and uncle who had randomly showed up for no reason. I said hullo to my aunt and uncle, but I totally ignored her. That really pissed her off I guess, because she was trying to be Miss Perfect Hostess in front of the relatives (really, who CARES? ESPECIALLY if they’re the in-laws and you don’t live here anymore.) but it made me quite angry to see that the bitch had dared to show her face at the house again.

So that anger quickly manifested itself into “fuck this, I’m getting drunk.”

And, long story short, I was embarrassing. I was the drunk girl. I kept trying to swan dive off of Lauren’s porch. I forgot close friend’s names. I didn’t even QUESTION whether or not Greg was okay to drive, I just got into the car and eventually stumbled into Cumby’s, blasted out of my mind. I bought a slushie which I then dumped in the parking lot two seconds later. We went to Ryan and Blair’s place and the SECOND we got there I stumbled into the bathroom and gakked my fucking brains out. I kept yelling for Blair even though she was in Providence, and I puked so much that Mike said I eventually was vomiting pure stomach acid. If it hurt, I didn’t notice. The vomiting did nothing to aid my inebriation, I may have settled my guts a bit, but I was still plowed to the extent that I couldn’t fucking walk.

We watched a few episodes of Cowboy Bebop and Hellsing, but eventually we started watching porn. Don’t ask me how or why, but we did. And of course, I’m trashed, and start sucking on Greg’s fingers, and he starts calling me a tease, so he told everyone we were going to go get food and were coming back later.

Well, that was a dirty fucking lie.

What really happened was us parking off in the woods somewhere by Cobb’s Corner and having really rough, filthy sex in the bed of his truck that I only really partially remember. I guess I was screaming, so he had to cover my mouth, I remember that. I don’t remember anything else, though. He did say that it was amazing even though he felt wicked white trash for doing it. Lol.

So it’s 4 AM at this point, and Greg decides he wants a big mac. So we pull up to McDonald’s, and the lady took too long to take his order, so he SPED off into the night, dropped Tony off, and went to drop me off.

Well, I lost my housekey.

AGAIN.
I slept in the fucking car last night. I woke up at 7AM to my father letting Chloe out, and I slid out and staggered up to the house. He just LAUGHED at me.

Dad: …did you SLEEP in there?
Me: …lost my key…
Dad: you were drinking, weren’t you?
Me: Yeah. Not gonna lie.
Dad: Well, go to bed, honey. *laughing*

And then my mother sent me a text message saying “U were rude and ignorant 2 me last nite” to which I replied that this was the second time she ran out on us like a little crybaby, and told her to stop texting me.

And this was her response, I shit you not.

“What do u care thought u were not going 2 miss me jane said u had probs I don’t stay in violent re lationships or didn’t dad tell u want he did? U get nothindont text me ps u ran out on me and treat me like shit go pierce something u r a bratt I did not raise bratts don’t know what u r”

That’s all her spelling and grammar, by the way. Pathetic, no? I hate her so much, she’s such a dumb fucking bitch. I hope she stays away.

So I showed the text message to my brother and we went out to eat together, smack talking her the whole time. It was awesome. But he said that I look like rent was due on the corner and I couldn’t pay. Didn’t know what I meant until I looked in the mirror, saw the MESS that my hair was, the crack-starved look in my eyes, and the GIANT fucking hickey on my neck that’s really gross. And miscellaneous bruises…

I’m pretty sure my boyfriend would uh. Kill me if I called him right now. So I’m gonna shower, and take a nap. It’s hot and I don’t want to do anything atm…

Just a side note. Has anyone seen the Prodigy music video for “Smack My Bitch Up”? I’m pretty fucking sure that was me last night…I really was that drunk. Disgusting.

I was in a really good mood earlier. I swear I was. I went to Providence with my girls, bought a copy of The Bouncer, a really nice t-shirt from The Crow and the aforementioned movie soundtrack.

But now, I'm just fucking angry because we went to Friendly's for our schedule, and I got a nasty surprise.

I always work Monday mornings. Always. For some reason I'm not this week. Lisa has the shift that I ALWAYS fucking have, randomly, so I opted to take this other girl's shift so I can, you know, have money.

And my boss won't let me.

Lisa came into the car and was like "Oh BTW, Israel said you can't work on Monday."

WHAT THE FUCKING HELL.

He lets everyone else in the store get away with fucking MURDER, and the second I want to take someone else's shift, on a day that I'm ALWAYS supposed to be working, mind, I can't?

I'm so angry right now, I'm literally shaking. What the HELL is THAT? Two years I've worked for this corporation-on and off, but nonethefuckingless-and I get THIS bullshit? God damn it, I'm one of the strongest waitresses he fucking HAS. Not in the same league as Lisa or Cale, but STILL. And he won't even tell me why I can't do it, either.

Fuck. This. I hope to fucking CHRIST that my father can get me into his company, then at least I'll have a car.

My boyfriend WAS right about a few of my friends. They really ARE selfish, conniving, backstabbing cunts.

So last night, shortly after I got off of work, Lisa calls me and tells me that she needs to tell me something face-to-face. She added that it was extremely important and that I needed to come over right away.

Still in my uniform, I RAN over there as fast as I possibly could, and the minute I get into her apartment, she tells me to sit down, and not to be too loud in my reaction to what she was about to say.

Basically, she told me that Kristin said that Bumdarts said that Jaime said that Greg cheated on me at the bonfire Saturday night.

I won't get into the details of what they said exactly happened. It makes me sick to my stomach to imagine something so utterly despicable.

Immediately after she told me, I couldn't fucking breathe. I just sat there, and then I started crying hysterically.

I tried to leave on the pretense of having a cigarette, but she wouldn't let me. She told me to smoke in her room instead, because she didn't trust me by myself.

So, I called Greg, still crying. I told him what was going on and of course he denied that anything happened. He went into how "I don't deserve this" and that he would "never do that to me", and started ranting about how he was going to go to Jaime's house and beat his ass. So I'm trying to convince him not to do that, and telling him that if something really went down that he could tell me and we could work it out, but he kept denying it. Eventually, he asked to talk to Lisa and he fucking flipped out on her over the phone, so she hung up on him.

For the next hour or so, Lisa told me to stay in the middle as to what went down, not to fully believe either party, etc etc. But then, she brought up his drinking and started claiming that he drinks too much, and I just WASN'T about to have that. I started yelling at her because I was not about to let her compare my boyfriend to fucking Bumdarts in his drunken promiscuity. So then, she started analyzing ME, and telling me that I'm used to guys cheating on me so I let important things slide, and claimed that I can never go too long without having a boyfriend, and just like...I couldn't listen to that. Maybe because I know it's true.

So, I managed to let her let me go outside, and I smoked a few cigarettes and thought. I decided that I wasn't going to derive any sort of opinion until I had a long talk with Greg. I also told Lisa not to bring it up for the rest of the night.

So, I got into bed and I put my headphones on. Lisa went on AIM in the other room, and while I'm seriously thinking about cutting for the first time in a VERY long time, if only to let some of the stress out, she walks in and tells me that Jaime was fucking kidding.

About EVERYTHING.

Also, there were several other people at the bonfire who would attest to the fact that Greg didn't do ANYTHING with Erin, which was what Bumdarts was telling everyone.

So what was initially two neutral parties claiming that he was unfaithful turned into one not-so-trustworthy party, and someone who absolutely hates me at that, claiming something totally off-the-wall and improbable with little to NO fucking evidence to support it.

I went through emotional fucking turmoil for nothing.

The relief, of course, was palpable. I can't even begin to describe what it felt like to HAVE to doubt the man I love, the man whom I want to spend the rest of my LIFE with, and then have everything be okay barely an hour later.

I threw up three times last night. Cried until I literally could NOT cry anymore. Didn't sleep a wink. There are awful bags under my eyes.

And...I'm hurt.

Not because of Greg, because I trust him and I know he wouldn't do anything like that. I've known deep down. Before, there was no doubt in my mind and that's just reinforced after all of this. I'm hurt because my so-called "friends" are really that vindictive. Just, things people said in reaction to all of this, like "I saw it coming". People are really that cold. People really want to believe rumours and just run with shit without any sort of evidence at all whatsoever. I can't believe...people would joke about things like that, too. Why would any of them want to hurt me? Hurt us?

What sucks the most is, I was the last one to know about all of this. Kristin looked me in the face throughout my whole shift last night, and didn't say a fucking WORD when she knew what was "supposedly" going on.

I just hope that Greg didn't really go to Jaime's last night to beat him up.

Cigarette.

Okay.

You have cheated on one of my best friends seven fucking times. You were planning on doing it several MORE times because you're that fucking insecure and don't like being in a solid relationship. You have her wrapped SO TIGHTLY around your finger that she's willing to still TALK to you after all of this. You are one lucky sonofawhore slut bastard for her letting you be in her life after all you've done.

I, however, will never forgive you. I won't be able to even look you in the face now.

And you DRANK MY FUCKING SVEDKA.

After I CLEARLY put a note on it stating that it's mine.

I don't care that I left it at Kristin's. You're a fucking alcoholic for drinking it despite the note.

CHRIST, I'm fucking angry.

...my brother is THE biggest fucking asshole ever.

I mentioned offhandedly that I'm going to get off my birth control because it's messing me up. Just gross downstairs-related stuff and more concernedly, the occasional chest pain.

I know why it is, too. It's because I smoke...you're not really supposed to smoke while you're on birth control, I guess. I read the pamphlet very carefully and it said that if you're having sharp chest pains, it COULD (allow me to emphasize--COULD) be the indication of a blood clot--if you're a heavy smoker. (10+ cigarettes a day)

That's half a pack. I go through a little over a pack every 9 days or so.

Anyways, I mentioned chest pains, and my brother starts fucking SCREAMING at me and telling me that I need-NEED to call a doctor. Like RIGHT NOW kind of call a doctor.

I tried to reason with him, I really did. I said that the chest pains weren't the main reason why I'm getting off the pill...how that despite its reliability, I'm just not comfortable with utilizing it as a method of birth control. Not only that, but chest pains can indicate a myriad of things that could have NOTHING to do with the sort of medication I'm on.

But, he just kept fucking going and ranting about how I can't just "stop" taking the pill, because I'll "die".

The whole time I'm just rolling my eyes and thinking "stupid pigheaded hypochondriac fucking MALE..."

He asked me who my doctor was and when I said I didn't know/didn't have one, he flipped out AGAIN, calling me irresponsible in so many words because I don't have health insurance...yeah, FUCK YOU, buddy. Sorry I don't have a cushy job that offers said benefits...NO way I can afford that shit on waitress wages. Hell fucking no.

So after telling him for at LEAST the ninth time to leave me alone and that I am NOT concerned enough to contact a physician, he storms off threatening to tell our mother that there might be something wrong with me.

Worse yet, he threatened to tell my boyfriend.

Fucking prick.

Mind your fucking business.

Christ.

First off, fuck you.

Fucking hypocrite.

Yes, he had a few drinks, and I admit wholeheartedly that he was being an asshole.

But was he the only one there who was being obnoxious?

No. Not in the fucking least. There were definitely people there who were being louder/ruder than him. Just because he vocalized a few things that you don't want to admit to yourself does NOT mean that you have the right to take out your anger on him.

It was your fucking fault that you invited so many people there, and honestly, did you EXPECT us to play nicely like good children and be quiet, just because your neighbours happened to show up? Do people EVER fucking listen to you anyways, when you tell them to be quiet, and did you HONESTLY expect to be heeded with everyone drunk/and/or/high?

Yes, I admit that he was saying things that were not in the least bit appropriate. I understand that he was being disrespectful, but you know what, he was extremely drunk, and what's more, he fucking APOLOGIZED TO YOU, right to your face. I don't give a shit that you're still mad, that's you being immature and unable to accept an apology. GROW THE FUCK UP.

Oh, and all this bullshit about us STRANDING you guys? No, I'm not gonna fucking take that. Who's fucking idea was it to peace out at three in the morning with no gas stations open, huh? And how the FUCK is it his fault that your boyfriend is so fucking stupid that he failed to fill up, knowing he was staying the night in fucking Cape Cod? What the fuck else were we supposed to do, besides go home?!

I know you think that your boyfriend fucking walks on water, but you know what sweetheart, he doesn't. He is far, FAR more obnoxious than Greg EVER will be when he's drunk. Sorry you guys couldn't run along and fuck each other's brains out like you always do at parties, I apologize for the motherfucking inconvenience, kay? I guess now that you know what it feels like, you don't like it, huh?

Grow the fuck up, bitch.